how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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