normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize