So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
a search helicopter?!
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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