How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize