help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
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