Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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