I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
