You work out of a Hotel?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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