i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
there is puke in my bra ... again
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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