Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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