I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
His hands were made for my vagina.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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