PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
