I think my vagina is haunted
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
