i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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