So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
