my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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