The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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