I love black thongs
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
My dick has a subreddit
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
