And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Randomize
