i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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