What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
