im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
