you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
