talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
