Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
