i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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