singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
