oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
someone owes me an orgasm
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
