"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
