Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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