I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i may or may not be watching the land before time
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize