Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize