This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
