Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Randomize
