I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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