I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
