Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Randomize
