I bet he comes in French.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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