I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
