Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
i think im in europe. pls send help
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
