Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
