yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize