I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize