He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
