haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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