make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
