i permit you to call me
I have demons in me.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
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