my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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