it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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