I'm going to rape someone's good day.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I had to cum in my sink.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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