I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Randomize
